cheesecake. i do not understand cheesecake. i will not eat it simply on the principle that it sounds like it is cake made out of cheese. i like cheese and i like cake. (well... i like icing on cake, so what if i scrape it off and then throw away the cake?) but together? ick. cream cheese. that just sounds like evil. and i do not consume dairy products that i think may be trying to kill me. apparently, however, i make a mean pumpkin cheesecake.
away messages. or, out of office auto reply messages. hello, if i am trying to hide from the world, why do i need to set a message in my email to tell people that?? let them think i fell into a black hole under my desk or that i ran away to the south pacific. no one needs to know my business but me. and really, i have no intention of returning your email as soon as possible, anyway.
having to work the day before or after a major holiday that will involve massive amounts of eating. come on. i am completely checked out at least 3 days before any holiday. just go ahead and give me the day before and after. i promise i'll be ten times more productive than if i just get the one day off.
weave. or hair extensions. whatever you want to call it. are you so ashamed of your regular hair cut that you need to glue in 10 inch long strips of someone else's? i mean, i know sometimes its hard to be patient if you are trying to grow out your hair, but really, if your hair is shoulder length one day and down past your rear the next, rest assured that we all know that shit's fake.
why i am still here. honestly. i am still at work. why is this?? this i must remedy immediately...
2 comments:
Have you ever seen Wham!’s “Club Tropicana” video? Very disturbing. On an unrelated note, Eddie Money is also underrated.
If you are that big a fan of raisins, you need to try raisin pie: http://www.roadfood.com/Reviews/Photo.aspx?RefID=3480&PhotoID=7261
It doesn’t get much worse.
I saw your stuff about Burger King. You make a compelling argument. They also made chicken fries, didn’t they?
You should put more of your photography up.
Happy thanksgiving.
Yes, sadly, I am on Facebook; I’ll check out the pictures.
Arthur’s Theme? That’s pretty bold, but I’ll let you have it. I remember an old roommate of mine had the Christopher Cross LP with the flamingo on the cover. It was an object of strange fascination, but I never got around to listening to it. Should I have?
How about Bob Seger? Underrated or too similar to Eddie Money?
No, I have not been to the Lincoln exhibit yet. Have you? Is it good? It’s not leaving anytime soon, is it? Yes, I know, three questions in a row.
I strongly urge you not to make or eat raisin pie. Its creation and consumption are both crimes against humanity.
Post a Comment