i will admit to having my fair share of phobias. i am unjustifiably afraid of mannequins (which also carries over into those crazy automated people – like in the hall of president’s at disney world) and mimes, i cannot stand the sight of jellyfish, and hell, i’m even a little creeped out by the dark. i am petrified of flying and have recently started this awesome thing where i cry pretty much any time i am on a plane. as i mentioned in a previous blog, i am also deathly afraid of anything that i can fall off of – ladders, fire escapes, rooftops –although i’m not afraid of enclosed heights. go figure. but that one i think may come from a lifetime of falling off of/out of stuff, like treehouses and cheerleading pyramids (they were supposed to catch me!!). so i mean sometimes it’s even hard for me to keep track of all of my numerous phobias. what i don’t get is the obvious ones. like germ phobia. i’ve made it this long without contracting any nasty gas station disease or growing like an extra toe or something from overexposure to germs in the showers at the gym, so in all honesty, i’m really not worried about it. i wash my hands when i need to. and it’s not like i’m going to shake someone’s hand right after i watch them sneeze into it. but i don’t get people who flip out and feel the need to disinfect every possible germ breeding surface area, carry hand sanitizer in their pockets so they can “wash” them 97 times a day, and refuse to come in contact with any person who is even thinking about carrying some illness causing germ around. getting sick is not a big deal. being killed by some creepy ass fake person in a department store is. those things have EYES, people, they can probably see into our SOULS!! i guess i shouldn’t scoff at some people’s fears when i list among my own things like “michael jackson is hiding under my bed” or “captain crunch is laying in wait to turn me into a soggy” but i can’t help it. i work with germaphobes and it’s especially hard during flu season to deal with being banned from the office for a simple sneeze (i kid you not, i was sent home for sneezing), or being instructed to disinfect the doorknobs in my office 3 times a day. WE ALL HAVE GERMS. get over it. don’t lick the pole on the metro and i think you’ll be just fine. you should seriously spend more time fearing those monster aliens that have come to earth in the form of mannequins to wipe out mankind and take over the planet.
3 comments:
First of all, never, ever come to my office. Do you know what I do for a living?
B) We can blame germ phobics for the mutant resistant bacteria strains. If they took a laissez-faire approach to bacteria like I do, they would build super immune systems like mine and their bacteria would stay nice and docile. Yeah, I said it. Dirt makes you healthy. Suck on that, germophobes.
you can't get diseases from communion or puppy dog kisses. it's a known fact. i just wanted to add my two cents in. Speaking of, Em, remember our discussion back in November re: Lin's phobia?
were you discussing my mannequin phobia behind my back, fools?? NOT COOL.
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